Prayer request...

I can't believe September is already here - Brevin starts school tomorrow - I start aiding once a week in his school (for a different class) - I got all my fall decorations out and decorated my house - Fall is my favorite time of year - my favorite season yet all I can think about at the moment is that I should have been 7 months pregnant - there are days where I am doing fine but then days like today where all I can think of is why.. why did this happen.. why did Troy have to die.. why did God let this happen - not having answers makes me sad and makes me angry sometimes - I may never know why but all I can do is take comfort knowing that Troy is with God - he is happy and loved in Heaven and I know I will see him again one day - I just pray that God will give me more peace in this... I pray that I will not lose sight of God because honestly I feel like I am fading away somewhat and it is hard finding my way back so those who might be reading this - if you could pray that my relationship with God grows stronger - that I get back on track again and that God shows me how to do that.. also that I would focus on what I have... my wonderful husband and son, Brevin... and not focus on what I don't have and what I want so badly... I would SO appreciate it!! I know God is there for me and waiting for me to come to him but I think I am so wrapped up in this grief that I cannot get my way through... tomorrow will be a better day.. I know this - God will see me through!!